Category Archives: adaptation

Writing Lesson of the Week – How to Write a Series

18 Tuesday Oct 2016

Posted by in adaptation, Common Criticism, fantasy, film, musings, story, writing, writing advice, writing lesson of the week

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I’ve taken a brief break from writing my novel as I’ve had a major freelance job come in, which means completing about a month’s worth of work in 9 days. I’m happy to be working, but also kind of questioning why I do this to myself.

I did see this post on another author’s blog about series books which are devoid of an exciting plot, devoting the entire first book in the series to the rising action with no real climax or a satisfying conclusion for the reader. It’s incredibly common especially for fantasy writers to write trilogies or series, myself included, but when publishing a book, I think we should learn the correct way to write them.

Tolkien started the trend of fantasy trilogies with The Lord of the Rings, but ironically this was actually unintentional. His book was published in three parts due to post-war paper shortages, which is why the end of The Fellowship of the Ring especially just sort of ends unexpectedly and picks up again in The Two Towers as if there wasn’t a break. The film adaptation handled it much better, by moving Boromir’s death to the end of Fellowship, providing a conclusion to his story arc, and ending one part of the story to begin another.

This is why all film trilogies are structured so that they can be watched and enjoyed as separate movies, rather than a single story told in three parts. If the credits started rolling after a random scene simply because it’s a third of the way through the story, you’d feel pretty cheated and wouldn’t be back to watch parts two and three.

Books should work in the same way. I initially planned my novel as a single story but had so many ideas that it will now be three. But I’m keeping the basic structure of the first book, with only a few unanswered questions and unresolved sub-plots, and even then only very minor ones, so that readers can still enjoy it as a coherent story and decide for themselves if they want to read the next book. While I am planning a plot twist for the end of book two, I still plan on wrapping up the story and main plot of that book and I hope that readers who have reached that point will be invested enough that the ending won’t bother them.

While I do wish there were more one-off fantasy books, I do still enjoy a good series, but only if it is written and structured correctly.

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Manga review – Strawberry Panic volume 1.

14 Friday Nov 2014

Posted by in adaptation, anime, christmas, manga review, musings, random, series review, shojo, story, writing

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It’s been a very long time since I’ve done a review on this blog, but after seeing this manga at the library in my new town, I knew I had to tear it to shreds. I’m just evil like that sometimes.

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Strawberry Panic is a yuri series about the various romantic relationships of a group of students attending three affiliated catholic all girl’s schools. It started life as a series of short stories in Dengeki G’s Magazine with couples decided by reader polls. Their success was followed up by light novel, visual novel, and a manga adaptations and then an anime series. It seemingly wasn’t until the anime adaptation that the series developed any plot, character development or charm. (I haven’t read the light novels but they sound fairly good too.) This volume of the manga reads like a terrible fanfiction; just a bunch of gooey, pointless romantic scenes all squashed together with only the barest hint of a plot holding them all together. The characters are even described as typical Mary Sues with ‘ivory hair’ ‘porcelain skin’ and ‘goddess like beauty’.

SP 3 001

The first volume starts the same as the anime with new student Aoi Nagisa getting lost on her first day at St Miator academy and becoming instantly enamoured when she runs into the beautiful and mysterious Hanazono Shizuma. She is the ‘Etoile’ who is basically like the royalty of the three schools. The story then quickly cuts to a week later when Nagisa has to accompany Shizuma on their assigned duty to collect holy water for the Easter celebration. The nuns must have been waiting for that holy water until Christmas because almost half of the book is the two of them wandering around to various places along the way and getting into random ‘romantic’ scenarios. They even have one in the middle of a crowded classroom, during class! Was the sister just sitting at the back playing Angry Birds while this was going on?

SP 4 001

The catholic school setting of this series has always confused me. I think it might have been for the ‘forbidden love’ angle but considering that virtually every character in this series is a lesbian and the staff never seem too bothered with the various lesbian couples, possibly even encouraging them to get together, their relationships hardly seem forbidden. The sister in the manga even says ‘the student going with you today will have an “eventful” time, won’t she?’.

‘Now girls, no lesbian sex while class is in session. Save that for mass this evening.’

‘Now girls, no lesbian sex while class is in session. Save that for mass this evening.’

Yes, the sisters of this school are fully aware of all the lesbian sex that is happening all the time and don’t even care! Maybe this is set in a world where Catholicism is more lax on these things, but then why include the catholic school setting in the first place then?

All this stupidity distracted me from the story, what little there is. Nagisa and Shizuma seemingly forget all about their classes or the holy water and go to the library, where the students all meet up for ‘liaisons’. There’s a really weird scene between two supporting characters, Hikari and Yaya, who are there to spy on Hikari’s crush, a popular girl named Amane, who is so popular she is nicknamed ‘The Prince’. Yaya has a crush on Hikari and randomly starts touching her up. And then we go back to Nagisa and Shizuma and the scene is never mentioned again! This will happen a lot in this manga, in fact the whole thing is basically random seduction scenes that are dropped and never brought up for the rest of the story.

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About half way through the manga suddenly remembers it has a plot and there’s a long tedious dialogue about the upcoming Etoile elections, but it’s still nothing more than a bunch of random scenes spliced together that go nowhere.

Meanwhile, Nagisa’s best friend and room mate Tamao has come to find Nagisa and Shizuma. I assume they spent so long fetching the holy water that everyone thought they had died. Tamao and Nagisa’s relationship is basically an expy of Sakura and Tomoyo from Cardcaptor Sakura, minus all likability. Tamao has a huge crush on Nagisa, who remains oblivious despite Tamao’s rather…disturbing attachment to her. While this was mostly played for laughs in the anime and you could still admire the close friendship between the two, in the manga it’s downright creepy. If you thought Tomoyo dressing up Sakura and video taping her was weird, then stay away from this manga.

Tamao stumbles upon Nagisa with Shizuma and assumes that they’ve already done it, and with the amount of time they’ve been away it’s understandable that she’d make that assumption. But Nagisa cheers her up with a cheesy ‘we’re such good friends yay!’ scene that still sounds like it came out of a poorly written love confession.

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To halt Tamao’s advances towards Nagisa, Shizuma announces that she’s going to enter the Etoile competition with Nagisa and then just leaves, so Nagisa doesn’t really have any choice in the matter despite being the supposed main character.

While in the anime Nagisa was naïve and clumsy, she was also kind, cheerful and actually called Shizuma out on her actions. In the manga she feels like nothing more than a Barbie doll who cares more about how pretty her uniform is than anything else, with dialogue like ‘Hymns sound kinda cool!’. She just drifts from scene to scene and lets things happen to her rather than have any actual say in them. ‘Nagisa, you’re my lover now.’ ‘Nagisa, we’re entering the Etoile competition now.’ ‘Nagisa, we’re going to fight an army of orcs now.’

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After all that, I’m not sure they even delivered the holy water…

The last chapter switches focus to Hikari and Amane, who were by far my favourite couple in the anime. Too bad their sweet, emotional story is a copy of Nagisa and Shizuma’s, except with more whining and George Lucas esque dialogue.

Bleurgh....

Bleurgh….

The Etoile entrants are announced and Amane isn’t happy with who she’s been paired with. The book ends on a sort of cliffhanger, teasing the identity of who Amane’s partner is, but since this hasn’t been foreshadowed at all I’m sure it’s not that exciting anyway.

I feel bad comparing this manga to a fanfic because there are tonnes of fanfics that are much better written than this manga. It’s just fluffy spank material with no substance to it at all and barely any effort put into the writing. I found the second and final volume in the library as well so I’ll be reviewing that next week. I just really want to know if they finally deliver the holy water…

Wicked Lovely Desert Tales volume 3 – Manga review

06 Tuesday Nov 2012

Posted by in adaptation, fantasy, manga review, shojo

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This is my first review in quite a while, so it seems fitting to return to an old foe. The final installment in Melissa Marr’s Desert Tales manga trilogy. I’ve reviewed the first two books already (the reviews are here and here) and if you don’t have time to read them, the basic summary is that I didn’t much care for them. The main issues I have are:
1. They’re confusing for people who aren’t familiar with the Wicked Lovely novels.
2. The characters are dull, unrealistic and annoying.
3. The story is all talk, no action.
4. The artwork is average at best.

And trust me, that’s me being kind.

Here’s a plot summary, but keep in mind I haven’t read the novels so there is a very likely chance that I get things wrong. You can call me out on them if you want:

The manga is set in the same world of Huntsdale as the novels, where beings known as faeries live unbeknownst to mortals. Faeries are humanoid creatures with magical powers and long life spans, but can only live in certain places (e.g. an ice faerie can’t set foot in a desert) and can’t touch certain materials such as iron and steel which are poisonous to them.

The faeries have their own political system and all follow a certain monarch, the main ones in the manga being the Summer and Winter courts. The only exceptions are the solitary fey who are like the biker gangs of the faerie world.

The manga tells the story of Rika, a human girl who was transformed into a faerie and forced to live her life in the desert, where she has become the ‘alpha.’ She falls in love with a mortal artist named Jayce and through some sort of accident he becomes able to see faeries and he and Rika form a relationship. All the while there is a battle of power going on in the desert and Rika must fight to keep her position as alpha and keep the desert safe.

I’ve probably made it all sound very exciting but trust me, it’s not. Any exciting or interesting moments are breezed over for endless prattling on about boring political matters. And good luck trying to understand any of it if you haven’t read all of the novels in the series.

So enough expo dump, let’s get started on book 3 of Desert Tales. Whoops, I’m starting to rip off Linkara! I won’t do that again.

First up the cover. Nothing to get excited about, they’re just showing off their serious faces. Rika’s boobs are slightly pushed out but that’s about it.

Open the book and you only need to get one panel in for a return to the bad artwork. Shy the fox faerie, who is apparently also the desert alpha which I don’t remember from before, is looking for Rika and witnesses some desert fey pestering humans. They commit horrible crimes like tripping people up and giving a little boy a small cut on his finger. Despite having a relatively small role in the manga thus far, they are going to be the main focus of the final book.

We then see Rika and Jayce about to leave the desert and being spied on by other desert fey. They’re surprised that Jayce can see them and Rika reveals that she gave him faery sight. So why was that never mentioned before? Is she talking about the time Jayce fell on her and then he could see her all of a sudden? It doesn’t take long for this manga to start confusing the hell out of me.

The two of them have a little talk about the nature of their relationship. It seems faeries don’t date mortals because our lifespans are much shorter than theirs. Jayce isn’t bothered because they’re happy in the present, showing that he really hasn’t put any real thought into this different lifespans thing or it’s implications.

Now this is an issue I’m writing about in my own fantasy novel, and I plan on having my main character really feel the reality of it and make it one of the main obstacles in the relationship (I won’t tell you how it ends).

Many other works of fiction have dealt with this issue much better (even Twilight made it a major plot point!) than just saying ‘well I’m happy now so who cares?’ For instance, the Lord of the Rings films handled it very well and went into it in great depth. How will Jayce feel when he’s an old man and Rika is still a young, hot teenage girl surrounded by equally young and hot faeries? And has he considered how sad Rika will be having to live for centuries without the one she loves? Read the Mayfly December article on TV Tropes for some decent examples of this issue.

So after that not-quite-romantic moment, Rika and Jayce go to see the Winter Queen to ask for her help. And how do they get there? Magical faerie super speedy running power!

Maybe this is why I don’t like faerie literature much – a lot of the time their powers seem undetermined and they pull faerie powers out their arses whenever the situation calls for it. In this volume alone there is this, the faerie sight, doing spins off of buildings and ‘faeries can’t lie.’ Just like Stephanie Myer’s vampires, just giving the characters a bunch of unexplained mystical powers doesn’t automatically make them supernatural beings. I mean, dragons may be incredibly powerful and can kill you in all manner of ways, but you know you couldn’t ask one to thread a needle. I know that analogy may have made no sense, but I assure you it did in my head.

Now the Winter Queen Donia is the only character in this entire manga who I actually like and am interested to read about. She has a beautiful character design with long flowing hair, a white wolf by her side and snowflakes in the background in every panel she’s in. She’s a lot like Gwen from Merlin, soft, gentle and intelligent but still able to queen it up when she needs to. Most importantly, she’s not ungodly annoying or inconsistent like the rest of this cast. Even her tragic romance with Keenan, who has been a real prick throughout the rest of the story, is surprisingly engaging. If the manga and novels had all been about her, I would happily read them, even with the slightly off writing style.

But of course, we don’t spend much time with her before we’re back to Shy and his…Girlfriend? When did Shy get a girlfriend? I thought he fancied Rika in the last book? He never once mentioned he had a girlfriend but now she’s just there and seemingly important I guess. Not only that but the two of them are sickingly lovey-dovey. Because how else are the readers supposed to figure out that these characters are supposed to be in love?

The two of them go to eat in a diner which is also being plagued by desert fey and a waitress is rude to them. I have no idea why the waitress is rude to them. Maybe she’s just as confused about this sudden plot point as I am. Last time there was the girl on the skateboard for no reason at all. I guess the story just really needed an unnecessarily rude waitress to break up the tension.

So after another fight scene that lasts for a few pages, there’s another long bout of talking and talking and more talking. I think this may be why I dislike this series – We see them talk about all sorts of exciting things – fights and disappearing faeries and potential wars, but do we see any of it? No, it’s like in a soap opera where you only get to see the characters talking about the important or exciting thing that just happened.

Also, Keenan shows up for only one scene in this manga, despite being talked about a heck of a lot. Wasn’t he sort of a big deal in the first two books? He’s even in the picture I’ve put at the top of the page. And then this happens and I really wish I had an interpreter to tell me what is supposed to be going on. Has Melissa Marr even read a manga before?

Back in the desert, Rika and Shy team up to go fight the big bad Mali (who despite being the main villain, has barely any exposure in this entire series) and regain control of their desert. Apparently they’re going to share the alpha duties now. Or maybe they did already. Was that what this whole story was supposed to be about, because I think I missed that.

So in pure badly written villain style, Malli is just standing there waiting for them with her minions by her side and her entire negotiation is ‘No.’ Wow, how late did she stay up writing that?

Afterwards there’s a scene of Jayce sketching in the desert with some of the desert fey watching him and they talk about the benefits of peace in the desert. This would have been a pretty nice scene, but it is also ruined by bi-polar character disorder. Jayce, who was portrayed as pretty peaceful up until now, brandishes a knife, supposedly to threaten the faeries. Then on the same page, one of the fey asks Jayce to sketch him and Jayce smiles happily saying ‘I’d love to.’ I feel like we missed a couple of lines of dialogue there.

Next we have Rika and Shy gathering up the desert fey I guess and informing them about their alpha-hood. And yet another faery super power comes out of nowhere – Rika can do spins off of buildings now! The panels are also set up very sloppily so it’s hard to figure out where the characters are positioned or what they’re doing or feeling.

This leads to the biggest anti-climax ever, or at least it would have been if there had been any decent build up to begin with. Mali is defeated and forced into exile. The desert is free and Rika and Shy sit and look at the moon and….That’s it! End of manga!

All that’s left is a brief epilogue where Shy introduces his girlfriend to Rika and Jayce, and the two of them (Rika and Jayce that is) vow to be together for the rest of their lives. Or the rest of Jayce’s life at least. Huh, that’s actually sort of a depressing ending…

I know there are a lot of people who like the Wicked Lovely series, but I also know there are a fair share of people who dislike them, along with me. Maybe it’s just because I’m not in the intended age bracket, the same reason I didn’t like Sugar Rush. Maybe I’ve just never been that into faery literature ever since Tinkerbell in Peter Pan. I never liked that little bitch. Maybe I really would enjoy the manga if I was a fan of the novels. Or maybe it really is terrible.

Putting aside the novels, the manga alone fails on it’s own merits. It has a few good parts, but otherwise there is nothing engaging or special about the art, characters or script. The romance plot is barely there, in fact it’s hard to define what the plot is supposed to really be. I don’t think Melissa Marr knows enough about manga scripts to be able to write a good one. Congratulations to her for trying though, not many people get the opportunity to have a manga published. But the whole thing just feels overly talky and is set out more like a novel than a manga.

If you’re not a fan of Melissa Marr and Wicked Lovely and have read manga before, avoid this series. From what little I’ve seen of the novels, I wouldn’t really recommend those either, except perhaps for teenage girls who are into Twilight. This is just another series that falls into the manga sinkhole.

Cloud verdict – 3/10.

But on the bright side, at least there isn’t a manga adaptation of Twilight! Wait, what’s that? They’ve done what?! Nooooooo!!!